Time Less
There are things that pop in my head like a tiny firecracker.
bang. snap. sizzle. small. very little smoke....gone.
They are just tiny pictures of things that don't always make sense. I feel like my brain is growing into space I didn't know I had. You think you can't possibly add one more memory, one more insignificant piece of information, or the whole gray wrinkled mess, will just cave into your chest, and then, there it is. One more thing. One more image. One more sentence. It layers itself into a million different planes of existence. I think to myself, it's all so impossible, and then I think, OH MY GOD, I just added yet one...more....word.
We are remarkable things, we humans. Wicked things. Wonderful things. Kind and cruel things.
Mysterious things, obvious things, deliberate and random. We are shards of a giant broken vase that the Universe dropped when it decided to be something.
It's not easy,- really truly understanding what you believe in. I don't always have words for what or why I believe in anything. I can't explain what God is to me, or what indeed God IS. Yes...God is everything, but that's an easy out. It seems like an undertaking that requires much more than a few sentences to explain yourself and what your beliefs are. I think we're given things to believe in from the second we come through the veil. We're given little hints and ideas and reassurances from the Abyss. We just lose them as we get older. The world picks away at our faith each and every second we stay here. It's a constant battle it seems, to believe in good things. To have faith that is indeed blind and without any tangible proof. You can't see stars during the day. You can't see your breath, but you can feel it when someone is nestled against your neck. I can feel the Universe nestled against my neck. I can feel something around me all me all the time. I can feel something shoot into my chest when I am given an idea. I am certain the "ideas" are not mine, they are simply gift of knowledge. We only discover what were allowed to discover.
The leaves here in the south are still a bright green. A few have fallen to the ground, but there is still a blanket of sage covering the entire city. The breeze is always damp. It's always fragrant. It's always got enough warmth to remind you that summer is gone for now. I walk around the neighborhood I am staying in and seldom pass anyone. When I do, they're pleasant, and they say hello and I say hello. We pass each other quietly. You can't hear your feet moving with the all the crickets that crick..... I always wonder who they are, these people I pass by, and what their names are and what they do for a living and what their houses look like. I wonder if I'll ever see them again. Was that it, we were just meant to pass by, and nothing more?
I wish there was a day where everybody had to have their homes open for anybody to just wander through. You could just go door to door and look through their cupboards and their sock drawers and their refrigerators. My mom and I always thought that would be fun. And then my mom would say, "But that would mean, that everybody could come through our houses"......
She thought perhaps that that wouldn't be so good after all.
Yeah, God and the great and Mighty Universe....
Much to ponder.
The funny part of it all, is how we argue with each other over what the truth is. It's hard to watch it on a global scale. The fighting that basically comes down to , "My God, is bigger than your God"....and the guns and the sirens wail. The righteous fighting the righteous....
Oddly, siren just went by the front door. I wonder if it's going to the house where the guy lived that I passed this morning? I think about things like that. I think about what might be wrong with him. I feel my brain compressing with all these layers upon layers of pictures and books and words and memories and feelings and ideas....
We just seem to keep finding more space, more gigs, more bytes. Computers have a lot to learn from the human head. We don't run out of storage. We just run out of time.
bang. snap. sizzle. small. very little smoke....gone.
They are just tiny pictures of things that don't always make sense. I feel like my brain is growing into space I didn't know I had. You think you can't possibly add one more memory, one more insignificant piece of information, or the whole gray wrinkled mess, will just cave into your chest, and then, there it is. One more thing. One more image. One more sentence. It layers itself into a million different planes of existence. I think to myself, it's all so impossible, and then I think, OH MY GOD, I just added yet one...more....word.
We are remarkable things, we humans. Wicked things. Wonderful things. Kind and cruel things.
Mysterious things, obvious things, deliberate and random. We are shards of a giant broken vase that the Universe dropped when it decided to be something.
It's not easy,- really truly understanding what you believe in. I don't always have words for what or why I believe in anything. I can't explain what God is to me, or what indeed God IS. Yes...God is everything, but that's an easy out. It seems like an undertaking that requires much more than a few sentences to explain yourself and what your beliefs are. I think we're given things to believe in from the second we come through the veil. We're given little hints and ideas and reassurances from the Abyss. We just lose them as we get older. The world picks away at our faith each and every second we stay here. It's a constant battle it seems, to believe in good things. To have faith that is indeed blind and without any tangible proof. You can't see stars during the day. You can't see your breath, but you can feel it when someone is nestled against your neck. I can feel the Universe nestled against my neck. I can feel something around me all me all the time. I can feel something shoot into my chest when I am given an idea. I am certain the "ideas" are not mine, they are simply gift of knowledge. We only discover what were allowed to discover.
The leaves here in the south are still a bright green. A few have fallen to the ground, but there is still a blanket of sage covering the entire city. The breeze is always damp. It's always fragrant. It's always got enough warmth to remind you that summer is gone for now. I walk around the neighborhood I am staying in and seldom pass anyone. When I do, they're pleasant, and they say hello and I say hello. We pass each other quietly. You can't hear your feet moving with the all the crickets that crick..... I always wonder who they are, these people I pass by, and what their names are and what they do for a living and what their houses look like. I wonder if I'll ever see them again. Was that it, we were just meant to pass by, and nothing more?
I wish there was a day where everybody had to have their homes open for anybody to just wander through. You could just go door to door and look through their cupboards and their sock drawers and their refrigerators. My mom and I always thought that would be fun. And then my mom would say, "But that would mean, that everybody could come through our houses"......
She thought perhaps that that wouldn't be so good after all.
Yeah, God and the great and Mighty Universe....
Much to ponder.
The funny part of it all, is how we argue with each other over what the truth is. It's hard to watch it on a global scale. The fighting that basically comes down to , "My God, is bigger than your God"....and the guns and the sirens wail. The righteous fighting the righteous....
Oddly, siren just went by the front door. I wonder if it's going to the house where the guy lived that I passed this morning? I think about things like that. I think about what might be wrong with him. I feel my brain compressing with all these layers upon layers of pictures and books and words and memories and feelings and ideas....
We just seem to keep finding more space, more gigs, more bytes. Computers have a lot to learn from the human head. We don't run out of storage. We just run out of time.
Posted by Jann
